Normally I don’t talk about this topic, but considering how many people have taken on the role of caregiver, I thought it an important topic to discuss.
As the world ages, caregiving has been taken on by more and more family members. Oftentimes, when chronic disease care is needed, family members must also step up for younger relatives. Not only is this role challenging, but many times goes unnoticed and/or unappreciated.
If you find yourself in the caregiver role, you know how it can:
Feel like you have no time for yourself.
Feelings of isolation.
Loss of identity.
Loss of freedom.
Feel drained of energy and well-being both physically and emotionally.
There are 34.4 million people in the US caring for either spouses, parents, or disabled children. Yet, they carry out this task, many times alone, with little to no help from family members. Much of this care is at the expense of the caregiver. So, how can you help someone who is put in this position, even if it’s yourself?
The one thing most caregivers would relish is time.
Time to read a book.
Time to go out for a cup of coffee.
Time to go out with friends.
Time for themselves.
Time for self-care, as well as strengthening and replenishing their energy.
Yet many of us believe that the help caregivers need is the opposite. Even though we have all the good intentions in mind when gifting these unsung heroes, a gift card to a restaurant, spa, or vacation— what we don’t realize is what they need the most is the time to do these things. What they need is someone to care for their loved ones allowing them to take advantage of these things.
But in most cases, they simply want an hour here or there to get time for themselves. So how do you help a caregiver you know and love?
Offer to watch their loved one for a couple of hours.
Pay for a service to come in and watch their loved ones so they can have some time for themselves.
Give them a card telling them how they are your hero for taking on such an important role.
Offer to be their listening board so they have someone to talk to. No advice is needed, just listen.
Introduce them to energy medicine to help them restore their energy and well-being in the moment it’s most needed.
If you are the one in the caregiving role here are a few ways you can even help yourself.
While your loved one is napping take that time to meditate and clear your mind.
While in the shower take this time to cry or scream-release, allowing you to get the frustrations you feel inside out through direct release.
Have a journal at your bedside and when you get up and before you go to bed just simply write down anything and everything that comes to mind.
Give yourself some grace. No one is perfect and you will have good and bad days. Stop beating yourself up. Acknowledge yourself and your contribution.
Tape is to your mirror and repeat it every day:
“Today, I will take a deep breath in as I move forward. I come to gain strength and to offer it. I know that I am on a path that I cannot walk alone, so I will find ways to connect and communicate my needs. I give myself permission to be vulnerable, recognizing that my fear is just courage looking for a way in. I know that even when I fall short of my hopes, I am enough because I try, and I care. When I am overwhelmed or frustrated, I will connect to the community of support that is my family of choice. There is wisdom in our connection, there is hope in our hearts, and there is strength in our togetherness. Today, I will exhale knowing I am not alone.” Source: : https://leezascareconnection.org/resources/im-new-caregiving-now-what/finding-new-normal/bbr-mantra.
Find a support group to help you through this.
Arrange to receive regular energy medicine sessions to take care of yourself, which will benefit whomever you are caring for.
Know that you may feel alone, but you are not. Remember, there are 34.4 million people in the same caregiving position as yourself. Reach out and find your tribe of supporters and caregivers. Look online for organizations that can help you through the trials and tribulations of caregiving.
Here’s to the unsung heroes known as the caregiver.
Carolyn Osborn
Clean Up Your Energy, Clean Up Your Life. For People & Pets.
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P.S. Our newest program Healing and the New Normal is designed to support you being able to move forward during these stressful times.
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